though i know tt i just blogged like 1 hour plus ago
o wells
i v sian dun wanna do my lab report
i realised
that i know whats been bothering me
and its not so frivilous as my bdae
like seriously its once a year
not much diff
but anyway
just now
was stoning with darrel
talking with him
relaxed
then suddenly
it hit me
i know wat was bothering me
it was school
its been school all this time
i'm really sian about school
about studying
about the homework
everything has been stressful
i've been so worried about sch
i tried to hide it
bluff myself
but i cant
and only in front of darrel
that i actually am brave enough to admit to myself and to him about it
so even though it was my bdae
i cried sad and worried tears
i dun understand wats happening in lectures
i dunno wat the lecturers talk about
i dunno how to do the tutorials
i'm surrounded by smart ppl who make me feel so pathetic and inferior
its frustrating
it makes me so upset
but i try to ignore it
act like i dun care
but the fact is that i really do
and i'm actually really worried
i just din want to admit it to myself
but in front of darrel i did
sighs
i wonder if there's anything about crying on ur bdae bringing u bad luck
o wells
hope i wun cry about this anytime soon again
i got many BIG hugs from darrel
hopefully it'd last me the whole of next week
for all the times tt i'd need a hug
sighs
:'(